Boyfriend asked me why I don’t want to hang out with Joy and I tried as best as I could to explain to him that she makes me feel inferior and awkward, and I cried at him about my parents and how they welcomed her with open fucking arms and FRAMED a doodle she shat out while we were all high one day a couple of years ago but I’ve had to slave for years for my parents to accept and understand that my art is one of the most important things in the world to me.
And boyfriend said, “She’s seventeen. How can she possibly make you feel bad?” which just serves as a reminder that I’m 21 years old and I’m totally dependent on other people just to make it through the day, most of the time. I’ve never had a job on paper. I’ve never tried that hard to get one, because I know I’m just going to be miserable, because I can’t stand up for more than an hour at a time because I’ve got these massive boobs because I’m FAT.
It’s just that she reminds me of all the reasons I suck. And I hate that. So I don’t want to hang out with her. :/
when you punish a person for dreaming his dream, don’t expect him to thank or forgive you.
the best ever death metal band out of denton will in time both outpace and outlive you.
I think I had a dream about JD the other day. He was playing at Shuffield’s or something, some tiny stage, and afterwards I went up to him and spilled my heart out about how much his music has helped me through awful periods of my life.
I really just…I want to tell him how much he’s touched me with his music. How he’s changed me, influenced me, made me better, helped me. The liner notes for The Sunset Tree say “you are going to make it out of there alive, you will live to tell your story, never lose hope.” And those simple words make me feel so much better in some of my darkest moments.
That, and this line from “Dance Music.” “Lean in close to my little record player on the floor— so this is what the volume knob’s for.”
Not that I’ve had any of these dark moments in the past few days, I’m just saying that JD is a good and powerful force in my life and EVERYONE SHOULD KNOW OF HIS WORK.
